Frequently asked questions

You still have questions? Le Council has assembled these resources to help navigate a post-Almighty-Ice reality.

Basics

How do you pronounce ‘Hockay’?

It is pronounced ‘Hockay’ or ‘Hoqué’. Not ‘Hockey’. Not ‘Hock-ee’. Not ‘Okay’. The Almighty Ice was very clear about this. Press play and commit it to memory.

Is Hockay real?

There are forty-eight arenas across six continents. There are players with names and statistics. There are games with scores. There are standings. If this is not real, Le Council would very much like to know what is.

What do I actually do?

You watch. You bet. You pick a team and care about them more than is reasonable. You check scores at work. You argue with strangers about whether Displacement is actually a disadvantage. You refresh the feed during a Whiteout and see nothing, because that is the point. Hockay is a spectator sport. You are the spectator. The Ice is the sport.

Can I play Hockay?

No. Hockay is played by Hockay players. You are not a Hockay player. You are a fan. This is not a demotion. The fans are the point. Without fans, there are no bets. Without bets, there are no Looneys. Without Looneys, Le Council cannot fund its ongoing investigation into Unexplained Ice Phenomena. You are essential. You are just not on the ice.

How do I pick a team?

You do not pick a team. You open the teams page, you look at the names, the cities, the colors, and something will feel correct. That feeling is not random. Le Council cannot explain it further. Go with it.

Can I switch teams?

Technically, yes. But Le Council has observed that the initial pull toward a team is rarely wrong. Those who switch often find themselves pulled back. The Ice remembers your first choice. Make of that what you will.

Why are there both men and women playing?

The Almighty Ice does not care about gender—biological or expressed—or lack thereof, or multiple of. The Ice demands players. And once playing on The Ice, only Hockay matters. Le Council reminds you that questioning The Ice’s decisions is both futile and inadvisable.

Is this like that other thing?

Le Council is not aware of any other thing. Le Council is aware only of Hockay. If you are thinking of a specific other thing, Le Council suggests that you stop thinking about it and start thinking about Hockay. The Ice did not come here to be compared.

The season & the game

How does the season work?

Each season spans approximately seven weeks. Forty-eight teams are split into two conferences of twenty-four, and each team plays a full round-robin inside its own conference—every rival once home and once away—for 46 matchdays. Twenty-four games run per matchday, one at the top of every hour, starting at 00:00 UITC. Then the playoffs. Two points for a win, one for an overtime loss, zero for a regulation loss. Le Council trusts you can do the arithmetic.

When are games played?

Constantly. Twenty-four games run per matchday, one at the top of every hour, starting at 00:00 UITC. Each game lasts roughly one hour—three periods of play. The slate does not stop and there is no dead window; whatever hour you are awake, something is on. Follow along like real sports, because The Almighty Ice insists that it is.

How does the playoff work?

Each conference runs its own bracket of eight. Seeds one through seven are in. The eighth seed does not advance—it hosts a single Wildcard game against a visitor drawn from every team that finished ninth through twenty-fourth. The draw is weighted: ninth place holds nearly thirty percent of it, twenty-fourth less than two. Finishing poorly is not disqualifying. Then Quarterfinals, Semifinals and a Conference Final, each best-of-three, and the two conference champions meet in a single-game Final. Season 3 was the first to run it this way, and Season 4 keeps it—see the season cycle.

What makes The Final different?

Every regular season game has fifteen-minute periods. The Final has one-hour periods. The game lasts three to four hours. The Puck has more time. The arena has more time. Things that would not normally happen in a regular game have room to happen here. Le Council cannot elaborate. Le Council does not know what will happen. That is the point.

Since a petition carried, The Final is also played on neither finalist’s ice. Season 3’s was played on 10 October 2026 at Graine Wetsky Arena, which The Ice did not raise. Winnipeg beat Nairobi 13-12, twenty-one minutes into overtime.

What is Rest Day?

The day after The Final. No games. No announcements. No advisories. The Ice is quiet. The Horn is silent. Le Council recommends sitting with whatever just happened. Le Council will resume operations when it is ready.

What timezone are games in?

All times in Hockay are expressed in UITC—Universal Ice Time Coordinated. The Almighty Ice does not recognize timezones. It appeared simultaneously across twenty cities, and has since appeared in twenty-eight more, and saw no reason to accommodate the arbitrary lines humanity drew across its surface. UITC happens to align with what the uninitiated call UTC. This is not a coincidence. There are no coincidences.

What does UITC stand for again?

Universal Ice Time Coordinated. It is the only timezone The Ice recognizes. It happens to correspond exactly to UTC, which Le Council considers a remarkable and entirely non-coincidental alignment. All game times, all advisories, and all official communications use UITC. If your local time differs, that is your problem, not The Ice’s.

Can players get hurt?

From Season 04, yes. A player can go down at a hit, in a fight, on a fall, or when equipment fails. The record says how bad it is at the next break: minor (out for the game), major (out for a number of games, with a free agent called up), or career-ending. Le Council expects most injuries to be minor. Le Council expects a few not to be. See how games happen.

What are star ratings?

Every player carries a rating from one to five stars. This reflects their base ability as assessed by Le Council’s scouting department. Modifiers, arena effects, and the general unpredictability of The Ice mean that a two-star player can outperform a five-star player on any given day. The stars are a guide. The Ice is the authority.

Mythology

Where did The Almighty Ice come from?

Le Council has no comment at this time. Le Council has never had comment at any time (except when we had comments). Le Council may issue a statement when it deems appropriate. Do not hold your breath. Breathe normally. Watch Hockay.

Is The Almighty Ice spreading?

Le Council can neither confirm nor deny this. Le Council notes that the number of Unexplained Ice Phenomena reported outside of arenas has increased by a statistically significant margin. Le Council advises calm. Le Council always advises calm.

What is The Sixth Dimension?

During any game, there is a small but non-zero probability that a player entering the penalty box will briefly cease to exist on the ice surface. They reappear eventually—usually within the same game, occasionally not. No returning player has provided a coherent account. Le Council classifies this as an ‘Unexplained Ice Phenomenon’ and assures you that concern is understandable but misplaced.

What happens when a player enters The Sixth?

They disappear from the ice surface, usually from the penalty box. They reappear later—changed. Players may return Luminous, Sharp, or Awake. They may also return Foggy, Brittle, or Hollow. Some come back speaking languages no one recognizes. Some come back with more gravity. Le Council tracks all outcomes. Le Council does not explain them.

What is The Jambono?

The Jambono resurfaces reality. Caretaker or corruptor—nobody knows which. Between seasons, The Jambono performs The Resurfacing, preparing the league for what comes next. During games, The Jambono has been known to retroactively alter events that already happened. The feed updates. The community notices. Le Council has no official position on whether this constitutes time travel.

What does The Puck do?

The Puck is also the referee. It is present at every game. It speaks once per season. What it says when it speaks has, historically, been, well, historical. Le Council advises paying attention when The Puck speaks. Le Council advises paying attention at all other times as well.

Who is JM?

Jean-Michel ‘JM’ Laflèche is the play-by-play commentator. He has been calling games since The Ice appeared and treats everything—including things that should not be treated normally—with the steady professionalism of a man who has seen it all.

Why is there a team in McMurdo?

Why is there a team anywhere? The Almighty Ice appeared in forty-eight cities. McMurdo was one of them. The Monolith play there. Visiting teams find their aggression suppressed. The penguins may or may not be involved. Le Council is investigating.

What happened five minutes ago?

Everything. The Almighty Ice appeared. Forty-eight arenas materialized. Players were already in jerseys. The rules were already known. It has been approximately five minutes since this happened. It has always been approximately five minutes since this happened. Le Council does not find this concerning.

Modifiers & arenas

What are arena modifiers?

Each arena has a unique modifier—a persistent anomaly that affects gameplay in that venue. Some are subtle. Some are not. The Ice placed them there. Le Council did not approve them but has learned to coexist with them. We recommend you do the same.

What are player modifiers?

Modifiers are conditions applied to players, often as a result of visiting The Sixth Dimension. So far, Le Council has identified the following modifiers and what we think are reliable categories. Positive: (Luminous, Echo, Sharp), negative (Foggy, Brittle, Wandering), ambiguous (Magnetic, Doubled, Ancient), and weird (Translated, Hollow, Tidal). Whether a modifier helps or hurts depends on context. Whether it fades depends on The Ice.

What are match modifiers?

Before certain games, conditions are imposed on the match itself. Thin Ice slows everyone down. Mercury gives the losing team a growing advantage. Fog blinds the goalies. Double or Nothing doubles everything—points, payouts, consequences. And sometimes, the modifier is Clean Ice, which means nothing unusual will happen. Supposedly.

Will there be more teams?

The Ice appeared in forty-eight cities across two conferences. If The Ice decides to appear elsewhere, there will be more teams. Le Council does not control this. Le Council does not pretend to control this.

Le Council notes that there is now a forty-ninth building. The Ice did not raise it, and it will never hold a team.

Economy & betting

What are Looneys?

Looneys are the official currency of Hockay. They are earned, spent, wagered, and occasionally lost in circumstances Le Council declines to elaborate on. They cannot be exchanged for any sovereign currency. Nor any sovereign currency can be exchanged for Looneys. The Almighty Ice doesn’t believe in fiat currencies.

Can I bet on games?

Yes. The betting system accepts Looneys. You may wager on who wins a game, on where a team finishes the season, and—once the playoffs begin—on how deep a team runs. A bet is decided when the horn sounds; the Looneys wait for the last game of the matchday. Le Council neither encourages nor discourages this. Le Council notes, however, that The Almighty Ice has been known to render statistical models irrelevant without warning.

How do I get more Looneys?

You receive Looneys upon enrollment. You earn more by betting correctly, logging in daily, and participating in the community. You lose them by betting incorrectly, contributing to your team during the intersaison, and making decisions Le Council cannot prevent you from making. The economy is simple. The emotions are not.

Can I spend real money?

Not on Looneys. Looneys cannot be bought, and there is no arrangement under which money becomes Looneys. The one place real money enters Hockay is La Caisse, Le Council’s member-owned fund: twelve dollars a year at the floor, and above it, a figure of your own. A sociétaire gets a second binder, a seal, and a day on which parish and petition stop competing for the one Seal. A sociétaire does not get better odds, higher limits, or any advantage in Looneys or shavings. The Caisse does not sell civic voice.

What is the wealth tax?

A levy in bands, assessed every matchday, on any citizen holding more than a hundredth of everything in Hockay—Looneys in hand, Looneys committed, and shares at what they would actually fetch. Most citizens never will be assessed. What is collected goes into the pot split among everyone who claimed a daily reward. What a citizen cannot pay, S.L.U.S.H. settles on Tuesday, and what cannot be raised is written off. → Taxes

What are cards?

Players as they were in a given season, and single games, struck by La Confrérie and numbered in the order they were struck. They are sold sealed, in Blisters, for Looneys and nothing else. A card does not follow its player into a better year or a worse one. A card you do not want recycles for Looneys. → Cards

What is Le Marché Gelé?

Where citizens trade with one another directly—Looneys, shavings, shares, cards—rather than against the pool. O.F.F.R.E. holds both halves until the deal settles. A filing fee, which is burned, and a commission on what each side receives; both have risen since the Marché opened. Nothing settled there prints a price. → Le Marché Gelé

How are the odds determined?

O.D.D.S.—the Office of Data-Driven Speculation—is the official department of LPCHUIP responsible for all published probabilities. Their methodology is transparent, mathematical, and boring. They are proud of this. The odds reflect player statistics, recent form, arena conditions, and factors their models cannot fully account for. They shift after every completed game as fresh results come in, so a team’s odds on their next scheduled game can tighten or lengthen throughout the evening. They are sometimes wrong. This is by design. If the odds were always right, there would be no upsets, and without upsets there would be no stories, and without stories there would be no Hockay. Only Ice.

What is O.D.D.S.?

O.D.D.S. stands for the Office of Data-Driven Speculation. It is an official department of LPCHUIP, staffed by actuaries, statisticians, and one person who keeps insisting the numbers are ‘trying to tell us something’ (they are on probation). O.D.D.S. publishes the official odds for every game. Their methodology is transparent, mathematical, and boring. They are proud of this. O.D.D.S. does not speculate. O.D.D.S. calculates.

Someone on the Internet mentioned something about O.M.E.N.?

O.M.E.N. stands for the Oracle for Mathematical Estimation and Numerology. It is NOT affiliated with LPCHUIP. NOT recognized. NOT endorsed. O.M.E.N. is a rogue group that claims to have developed a method of ‘resonating’ with The Almighty Ice—or as they insist on calling it, ‘reasonating,’ a portmanteau they invented and refuse to stop using. They believe the odds published by O.D.D.S. are incomplete because they fail to account for The Ice’s intentions. O.M.E.N. publishes their own alternative forecasts, which are sometimes wildly wrong and sometimes unsettlingly accurate. Le Council’s official position: Le Council is aware of the organization styling itself ‘O.M.E.N.’ Le Council does not recognize, endorse, or affiliate with this group. Le Council reminds all participants that The Almighty Ice does not communicate through spreadsheets, crystals, or whatever a ‘resonance array’ is. Le Council advises participants to rely on O.D.D.S. for official forecasts and to disregard unauthorized numerology.

Institutional

Who runs Hockay?

Le Permanent Council du Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena (LPCHUIP) is the governing body. Half sports league, half paranormal investigation unit. Le Council runs the operations. The Almighty Ice runs everything else. The jurisdictional boundaries are, to put it diplomatically, under ongoing negotiation.

What is H.O.R.N.?

H.O.R.N. stands for the Hockay Official Relay Network. It is the broadcast arm of Hockay—scores, events, conditions, and advisories relayed in real time. If something happens on The Ice, H.O.R.N. announces it. If H.O.R.N. announces something that did not happen on The Ice, Le Council advises you to act as though it did.

Is there a community?

There is a Discord. There is a presence on Bluesky. H.O.R.N. broadcasts to both. There is a subreddit if you’re into that kind of things. The community argues about modifier effects, tracks player careers, builds spreadsheets, and develops theories about The Ice that Le Council finds alternately fascinating and alarming. You are welcome to join. Le Council is already there. Le Council is always there.

Is The Almighty Ice affiliated with any government agency?

No. The Almighty Ice is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or in any way associated with any governmental body, agency, bureau, directorate, or enforcement authority of any nation, whether or not they share an acronym. The Almighty Ice predates all such institutions and does not recognize their jurisdiction, authority, or competence. Le Council has received inquiries about this and finds them tiresome. There is only one Ice. It is Almighty. It plays Hockay. It does not knock on doors.

How far does this conspiracy go? Who’s involved?

Le Council does not entertain conspiracy theories, nor does it endorse the wearing of tin foil hats, aluminum headwear, or any other makeshift cranial shielding. The Ice is not a conspiracy. It is an Unexplained Phenomenon, which is an entirely different category—one that Le Council is uniquely qualified to investigate and selectively ignore. As for who is involved: Le Permanent Council du Hockay operates with full transparency within the boundaries of what it has decided to be transparent about. The identities of its members remain glacified—not out of secrecy, but out of an abundance of caution for their personal safety. The Ice attracts attention. Not all of it is welcome. If you believe you have uncovered something, Le Council suggests you have not. If you persist, Le Council suggests a hobby. Might we recommend watching Hockay.